More I don’t understand – Ham.

8 Jan

Let’s be clear. I speak French. I never said I speak it well.  Once in a while, you realize you have been wrong about something you thought you knew for quite some time. Like the time les Monstres got the chickenpox and I realized Pirate called them chicken pops. When questioned, he admitted that’s what he thought it was really called. Cute. Back to my own realization…. So there we are, at the deli counter. Now let me start by explaining that there is an ever presence of ham on this island. It’s everywhere. In everything. You got your sliced prepackaged ham with slight differences like the slimy casing cut off or not…you got your dried ham, your smoked ham, and your little diced up morsels of ham, ‘les lardons’. The word lard being in the name was enough for me to not want them in my salads, but they are quite lovely in an omelet. Each cube has half ham and half fat. Total diet food.

So as far as I knew, the word jambon meant ham. Look at the screenshot from Larousse dictionary.  Did I misunderstand? Apparently. So I’m looking in the glass case at the deli counter. I’m saying to Pirate, “I just want some freaking turkey. Why is that not possible?” He replies, “Mais oui, it’s right there, look – jambon dinde“.  To reference Larousse again, dinde is defined as ‘turkey’. So. I implore you. What do I take from this written on a sign sitting on a big lump of meat? ‘Jambon dinde’ or ‘ham turkey’? Ah hah! Pirate’s eyes opened wide and his smile slowly spread, I know that at that moment, after all of my jabs corrections on his English, he was thinking, “At last! Mockery is mine! Muhahahaha!”  He explained to me that jambon refers to a piece of meat of any kind, so I guess I could substitute the word deli for jambon to explain it. Like deli turkey, deli salami, etc. Now when I see the second definition of jambon as ‘thigh’, that makes a bit of sense. But godammit, why did it have to be the same word as ham?!  So we took some TURKEY slices and now my whole view on the world of deli has changed. Apparently the entire window is not filled with ham-turkey and ham-chicken and ham-salami and ham-ham. Well fine then. I’m going to go make a sandwich. Without butter. Because really, what is it with the butter on the sandwiches?!

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2 Responses to “More I don’t understand – Ham.”

  1. Allen January 8, 2012 at 11:58 #

    I feel for you! I’d be mocked mercilessly, however: I’m vegetarian. Not an easy thing to be in France!

    • Girl in Guadeloupe January 11, 2012 at 11:32 #

      No it isn’t! Guadeloupe either…although the fresh seafood does make a nice option if you’re not a vegan. I ended up not really liking the turkey, not even sure why I took it as deli in general isn’t really my thing. Except for raclette..oooohhhh

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